Thursday, March 25, 2010

What do you do when you fail?

I've failed a work licensing exam that I never wanted to take but was pressed upon me. I've given up Sunday riding in the first winter ever that one could actually ride most weekends. I spend one day a weekend at the office studying the other weekend day was our long run and errands.
So now I'm back studying when we absolutely have to strip the drywall and insulation from our basement to get rid of the black mold that sprung up last summer while we were training for Ironman. Everything that was put on hold for Ironman now weights heavily upon me and I feel overwhelmed and resentful and actually, very very stupid. Everytime I think I've made progress on the material I self test and it's lost. I've told the portfolio manager I work for that the only way I will be able to pass again in 2 weeks is to take time during the day to study because, well, my personal life just has to go on.

I'm trying so hard not to throw a pity party and invite everyone to it but I'm tired and sad and frustrated. I'm human I guess.

My positivity sponge has been wrung dry.

1 comment:

  1. At least you are posting a picture of a cute puppy and not some stupid little bear cub.

    Feel better?

    So sorry about this news. It is a bummer.